Presenting “I WILL NOT BE PURIFIED”: Sophie Strand’s powerful live reading put to music and film.
Hallo Dear Patrons.
And now for something completely different….again.
A new film, a Thing, a cri de coeur.
Maybe watch it first….and then read all this nonsense below.
………………….
All the artists are reading the comments here. Please, don’t be shy. Talk to one another. Respond to others’ comments. I am sure this one will elicit some heavy and hopeful discussion.
……………………….
This is a warning, and an invitation: this video and music project is both gorgeous, and confronting.
It is troubling and necessary.
It is for everybody, but it is especially for those in the community who have ever dealt with sexual assault (and further, early childhood sexual assault), debilitating illness, or for anyone who has stood close to those edges, or dealt with the dark of what our bodies can do to (and for) us.
It is called “I WILL NOT BE PURIFIED”.
It is a battle cry of beauty and power.
It’s a film of a deeply powerful live reading by writer Sophie Strand…set to live piano and violin music by Amanda Palmer (that’s me) and Gracie and Rachael, with the whole recording lovingly collaged into a mini-movie painstakingly assembled and edited by musician & polymath Holly Miranda.
It is an extraordinary and unique piece of work; I’ve never put out anything quite like it, and I don’t know if I ever will again – moments like this are accidental and rare.
And let me remind you that a project like this is only made possible by patronage. In no other world could work like this be profitable (or pay for itself. No world I know, anyway).You can read the whole story and then watch it, or vice versa. A lot of time, work and love went into this project – and you funded it. Thank you.
Make it go viral if you can. This is the kind of viral we need in our lives.
The only way this video will be seen on the internet is if you share it and say some words about how it moved you (if it moves you).
Again: the youtube link to share is:
You can also just share this patreon post, it’s public (but long!).
https://www.patreon.com/posts/73123715
I’ll be putting it up on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter soon.
I’ll send those links when I have them, or keep an eye out. And go forth, now, as you wish, and AMPLIFY!!!!
…………………..
BONUS!!!!
WE ARE GOING TO DO A PROJECT Q&A/WEBCAST & READING FOR PATRONS ONLY!! There be a live webcast WITH ME AND SOPHIE AND HOLLY together at my house, for ALL PATRONS, at 5pm on FRIDAY, Nov 4th.
We will discuss the video, Sophie’s piece, and whatever other fun things arise! Illness, life, death! And Sophie will read a little from her new book, and maybe Holly and I will play some tunes 🙂
PLEASE RSVP NOW and start chatting, and there’s no reason you can’t also use this crowdcast, RIGHT NOW, as a place to discuss and connect in REALTIME. WHY NOT? It’s there. GO….
https://www.crowdcast.io/e/k0beo4sq
………
MORE ABOUT THE PROJECT
When I started this full-time crowdfunding-on-patreon concept, I fantasized about moments like this one.
Moments where artistic impulse could strike, worlds could collide and mesh and grow, and powerful, important artwork with absolutely zero commercial potential could exist and thrive and still launch into the world.
This kinda thing/film is why I started a patreon. I was too tired of seeing connections and having ideas and no way of funding all the possibilities that artists invited. I was too tired of paying out of pocket for the things that wanted to grow but had no resale value in the commercial market.
We recorded this piece LIVE at the O+ fundraiser event at the Old Dutch Church in Kingston, NY in August. Thanks to patreon, we webcast, and you can still rewatch here, the piece starts at exactly 2:47:10.
Sophie read, while Gracie and Rachel and I played piano and violin to accompany the reading.
Here are some stills from the night.
That’s Sophie up at the pulpit (how perfect?) and Rachel on Violin.
And Gracie and I played the piano…four-handed.
Holly Miranda was originally supposed to guest at the show too, but she couldn’t join us, because she got Covid.
Had she been there, she would have joined us for this piece, on guitar.
Instead, the three of us composed this little offering, and we watched (and played, in awe) as Sophie brought the audience into a state of total rapture.
When Holly saw what she had missed (because we luckily webcast the whole night, which made it easy), the idea was born to create a video out of the sound recording. Holly is an incredible multi-media artist, and it started as a healing endeavor, to fix the fact that we hadn’t been able to all be in the same room. Then it grew.
And it grew and grew and grew.
……
I first found out about Sophie Strand’s’s writing and work when I was living in New Zealand. One post led to another during some late-night instagram hole, or perhaps someone sent me a post of hers to read, and I was transfixed.
I followed her, and I kept reading. Her writing was so pure, so dirty, so honest, so hard, so refreshing…I was addicted. I went, at some point, to her bio to find out more about her. She lived in WOODSTOCK. This is where I was supposed to be living.
From the weight and depth of her writing, I assumed she was a 75-year-old woman. A power crone. I messaged her. I am your neighbor, I said. I am humbled.
She was not a 75-year-old woman. She was a 28-year-old Bard graduate. She knew my work. We vowed to befriend one another if and when I returned to America. I returned.
We kept our vows.
………
I met Gracie and Rachel shortly before leaving for the European leg of “there will be no Intermission” tour – the one that landed me in New Zealand, when they were opening for Ani Difranco in my hometown – Woodstock, again. Their talent and humor and soulfulness blew me away. Again, kindred spirits. they were based in Brooklyn then, but shortly thereafter, Gracie moved down the street. She’s now my neighbor.
………
When O+ invited me to do this benefit, my choice in compatriots was obvious. 🙂
……….
When I first invited Sophie to perform at this benefit, she sent me several pieces.
I had read a lot of Sophie’s work, mostly on Instragram and Facebook (where you should follow her), but I had never read this particular piece.
It stopped me in my tracks.
This O+ benefit was, I need to remind you, an undertaking that fundamteally tries to fix and address a truly broken health care system in our country.
It was a night about exposing the truth, and addressing the deeper, harsher, systemic problems.
How we think about illness.
How we think about care.
There was not a more perfect piece she could have read.
I invited Gracie and Rachel (and Holly Miranda) to help me arrange a bed of music – a compost from which she could read – under the reading to give it extra heft.
Holly wound up having to bow out because she tested positive for Covid the day before.
During the performance, Gracie and I sat beside one another at the big grand piano, Rachel picked up her violin, and Sophie took to the pulpit.
It was a unique moment on earth. Anyone who was there would tell you that.
I wanted to release it as a stand-alone youtube clip, but then this idea of making a more film-y film came up with Holly, who had the time and wherewithal and desire to do it.
I had patreon.
We were off to the races, and you can read more about Holly’s process below.
What you hear is an untouched, unedited recording of that live performance (Holly cleaned up the audio).
While we were working on the edit, I watched this clip five times before it made me cry.
Then, without warning, about ten days ago, I was reading the text for typos, and I hear Sophie’s voice saying
“Okay.
You’re Nasty.
But please
make something grow….”
And I burst out bawling in my little office.
the power of art never ceases to amaze me.
……
A LITTLE BIT MORE ABOUT THE ARTISTS INVOLVED…..
(photo by Hanna Pribitzer)
HOLLY MIRANDA
Holly Miranda grew up between Detroit and Nashville, two music towns that would influence her own journey in a very profound way. She began playing piano at the age of six, taught herself guitar at fourteen and moved to New York at sixteen to start her professional career. For over twenty years, Holly has been performing, writing and producing with some of the best talent in the business. She has performed with the likes of Karen O, Lou Reed, The XX, and Lesley Gore. She released two records with her band The Jealous Girlfriends and has co-written and produced a mass of other projects.
In 2021, Miranda and her long time collaborator, Ambrosia Parsley (Shivaree), started a co-operative record label called Eye Knee Records. The phonetical spelling of “Ayni”; a way of living by reciprocity. For every ten releases they donate 100% of the proceeds to a charity that benefits the communities of Earth. They have released twenty-one singles and a collection of sound installations Holly wrote for a sculpture garden in Pamplona, Spain (Un Bosque). Each single is accompanied by a music video and a story, the readers digest of record labels if you will. Catch Holly on tour and visit EyeKneeRecords.Com and sign up for the mailing list to stay in the know about what they have coming next.
……
SOPHIE STRAND
Sophie Strand is a writer based in the Hudson Valley who focuses on the intersection of spirituality, storytelling, and ecology. Her first book of essays The Flowering Wand: Rewilding the Sacred Masculine will be published by Inner Traditions in November 2022 and can be pre-ordered on Amazon here. Her eco-feminist historical fiction reimagining of the gospels The Madonna Secret will also be published by Inner Traditions in Summer 2023. Subscribe for her newsletter at sophiestrand.substack.com. Join in her upcoming course Rewilding Mythology with ADVAYA at www.rewilding-mythology.com. And follow her work on Instagram: @cosmogyny and at www.sophiestrand.com.
You can read Sophie’s entire “I Will Not Be Purified” text here: https://www.artpapers.org/i-will-not-be-purified/.
……
(photo by Sara Laufer)
GRACIE AND RACHEL
The Brooklyn-based duo Gracie and Rachel has emerged as a formidable force in challenging the boundaries of pop music. Blending baroque textures, ethereal sonic-scapes, and penetrating vulnerability, the duo creates an emotionally haunting sound all their own. Their sophomore album, Hello Weakness, You Make Me Strong, released on Ani DiFranco’s Righteous Babe Records, explores the depths of their emotional states and the walls we build up inside ourselves. It’s music to excavate our inner fears and help us find empowerment from within.
Seen on stages supporting Tori Amos, Ani DiFranco, Amanda Palmer, Julien Baker, and more, the collaborative duo of keyboardist, Gracie Coates, and violinist, Rachel Ruggles, have performed two NPR Tiny Desk Concerts and been praised by the outlet’s Bob Boilen to “mix pop and classical in stark, infectious ways and make unforgettable, surprising music.” Look out for new music and more touring coming from the duo later this year.
……
SOME WORDS FROM THE COLLABORATORS ON THIS PROJECT, AND WHAT IT MEANS TO THEM……
From Sophie…
Dear Patrons,
As a child, I was told that I would die if I spoke about my abuse.
And it wasn’t until the summer of 2020 that I realized that the opposite was true. I would die if I DIDN’T speak and write about it. The silence had forced the trauma deep into my body, requiring that it get creative, using genetic glitches and physical symptoms to speak through my very physicality when it was denied access to my voice. When I wrote I Will Not Be Purified I was shaking. I was a decade deep into autoimmunity and illness that I knew was entangled with a legacy of self-silencing. I did not think anyone would read it. And if they did, they would might be very angry. I posted the piece on social media early in the morning and then turned off my devices. When I finally looked at them later that night the piece had been reposted thousands of times and my inbox was overflowing with people saying, “Me too. Me too. Me too.”
Curses are not broken alone. They are broken in community. In the connective tissue that grows between strangers when they realize they have been navigating the same underworld realm, the same chronic illness, the same PTSD.
Standing in the Old Dutch Church, reading this piece aloud, with Gracie and Rachel and Amanda weaving their music through my voice, giving a melodic body to the skeletal vulnerability of my confession, feeling the breath of the audience infuse into my own inhalation and change me, I realized that these are the rituals we need to in order break the isolating cure of shame and silence and pain. We need to make art together about it. We need to collaborate.
I’m reticent to use the word healed because it’s too neat a bow to put on something like incurable illness or PTSD, but when Holly created a visual ecosystem to accompany these words, it felt like something shifted in me. A joint, long subluxed, slipped back into its socket. A fever broke and sweat crested as a crown of relief across my forehead.
We do nothing alone: loving, healing, art-making. Thank you Amanda’s patrons for being my collective fairy-grandmother. My doctor. My gargantuan guardian angel. Our root systems are tied together now. My mycorrhizal nourishment and gratitude flow back to you.
Thank you Holly and Amanda and Gracie and Rachel.
May we all begin the collaborative work of composting each other’s thorniest stories. May we break curses by planting them in the soil of creative community.
-Sophie
{from Amanda….here’s a photo of Ash playing in Sophie’s apartment a few weeks ago. She’s the plant aunt.}
………….
From Holly…
Dear Patrons,
This was by far the most intense video editing work I have done. Up until now the videos I’ve made from public domain footage have been short form music videos. The longest being Amb. Parsley’s “Atlantis” at 5:34. However, it was more than the length that intensified this process. Sophie is a friend who’s story is so very important and inspiring. I wanted to do anything I could to support her message. Anything to bring more ears and eyes to this beautiful and brave spirit.
I spent weeks combing the depths of public domain videos. Sometimes downloading hour long videos for two second clips. It is a back breaking process, but when you start to see the story coming together it propels you to dig deeper. I get so excited that I could hunch over my desk for an entire day chopping away.
When I begin a project like this I don’t have a clear picture of how it will end but rather a list of key words to search. The list for this video conjured corners of archives I had not yet explored. Bacteria. Medical experiments. Fertile soil. Compost. The deeper I dug and the more passes I made, I began to feel different. It was infecting me with a new way of thinking about illness, abuse and healing. A softer approach. An all encompassing practice.
My goal was to make a visual accompaniment that did not distract from the story but helped to tell it. I hope I have achieved this and I am so honored and grateful for the chance to make art with my friends and hold each other up in this way. Thank you Sophie for entrusting me with your words. Thank you Gracie and Rachel for your gorgeous music. Thank you Amanda for bringing us all together and creating a space for this sort of weird beauty to blossom. Thank you Amanda’s Patrons for funding it all!!!
………..
From Gracie and Rachel…
In a culture that so often attempts to eradicate its problems in lieu of walking with them, Sophie’s gut-wrenchingly compelling manifesto asks us to decompose the notion that our healing requires purification. What if embracing a little contamination was the path toward our growth, the key to our revitalization?
“The gut doesn’t want purity. It wants diversity,” she reminds us. “Healing isn’t about completion. And it isn’t about lightness. It’s about the mixing bowl where nothing is rejected. Everything is included.”
Sophie’s words allow us to dance with the monsters inside us, to hold hands with our pain, to remember that we will thrive if we incorporate over eliminate. If we can add instead of subtract, compost instead of clean, we just might be able to grow a garden from the soil beneath us.
–Gracie and Rachel
……
WHERE TO FOLLOW THESE ARTISTS…
Sophie Strand‘s upcoming book “The Flowering Wand: Rewilding the Sacred Masculine” can be pre-ordered on Amazon here.
Subscribe to Sophie’s newsletter at sophiestrand.substack.com.
Join in her upcoming course Rewilding Mythology with ADVAYA at www.rewilding-mythology.com. And follow her work on Instagram: @cosmogyny and at www.sophiestrand.com.
……
Holly Miranda has dates coming up with Ani DiFranco in November, along with Gracie and Rachel. All the dates are at https://www.eyekneerecords.com/events-wav
You can also find her Patreon at patreon.com/HollyMiranda
Official Site: https://www.hollymiranda.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HollyMirandaMusic/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hollymiranda
Twitter: https://twitter.com/hollymiranda
YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/user/hollymirandavlog/featured
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/0CNehpGYdxk87YYMiBpnyP?
si=bFKnJwOfSyife-fbWHMoyw
Apple: https://music.apple.com/us/artist/holly-miranda/277964194
……
Gracie and Rachel hit the road again this November as part of the Righteous Babes Revue supporting Ani DiFranco.
Find Gracie and Rachel’s tour dates here, and keep your eyes and ears out for a new EP of music coming from the duo soon.
Check out their TINY DESK on NPR!!! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6_tzgvTDNds!
……
CREDITS:
Written and read by Sophie Strand
Music by Amanda Palmer & Gracie and Rachel
Recorded at The Old Dutch Church, Kingston, NY, 08/13/22, at O+ Festival Benefit 2022
Sound by Dave Chapman
Video and Audio post-production by Holly Miranda
Support these artists:
sophiestrand.substackcom
The Flowering Wand: Rewilding the Sacred Masculine, by Sophie Strand, out November 22nd 2022. Pre-order now at simonandschuster.com or any online bookseller
……..
WE ARE THE MEDIA.
I LOVE YOU ALL.
Please, again: comment, discuss, find and nourish one another.
I’m bopping on and offline because I’m with my dad and sister this week, but I am so excited to see how this one hits you.
XXX
AFP
——THE NEVER-ENDING AS ALWAYS———
1. if you are a patron and new to my work, don’t forget your patronage allows you access to ALL of my patreon releases to date. HERE is the link to download my latest big solo record, “There Will Be No Intermission”, and HERE is a link to download the PDF of the art/essay book that goes with it.
2. if you’re a patron reading this post via an email notification, please click through to comment on this post. at the very least, if you’ve read it, indicate that by using the heart symbol. that’s always nice for me to see, so i know who’s reading.
3. see All the Things (over 150 of them) i’ve made so far on patreon:
http://amandapalmer.net/things
4. JOIN THE SHADOWBOX COMMUNITY FORUM, find your people, and discuss everything: https://forum.theshadowbox.net/
5. new to my music and TOTALLY OVERWHELMED? TAKE A WALK THROUGH AMANDALANDA….we made a basic list of my greatest hits n stuff (at least up until a few years ago, this desperately needs updating) on this lovely page: http://amandalanda.amandapalmer.net/
6. general AFP/patreon-related questions? ask away, someone will answer: patronhelp@amandapalmer.net