STILL LIFE FROM 32B
STILL LIFE FROM 32B
Boarding the second plane after flying from Melbourne
Slumping at the SFO gate
And looking up at Brendon
Saying
Well
Welcome back to America
And the in silence both our faces says enough
Against:
The woman yelling “FUCK YOU, just FUCK. YOU.” into her phone on the travelator
The tech bros and girls at the gate having this very loud conversation about the google doc that should have been fucking circulated yesterday yeah those stupid dipshits and it’s hard to tell if they’re being extra loud so we know they are smart and have job jobs even though they all look like twelve
And the American flight attendants on the Melbourne-SFO serving coffee with no eye contact and a perma-grimace seeming to indicate that they’d rather slowly choke you and watch you expire right there in the seat
Than give you this coffee
And I buy the New York Times at the gate and I smile at this super bent old guy with a splotchy white and brown face being pushed in a wheelchair onto the flight and he smiles back at me real wide and sparkly and he says
“It’s been a long time since I’ve seen skates, since I’ve seen skates”
And I actually look down at my feet to see if I forgotten I’d worn skates on a plane and oh no am I in trouble because that’s how my weird brain works
And I think…oh…and see the orange bracelet around his wrist that says something risk but I can’t make out the first word
And he sits five rows behind us and as the plane takes off he starts scream-moaning
“I CAN’T BREATHE I CAN’T BREATHE GET ME OUT OF HEEERE
EVERYBODY LISTEN TO ME
I CAN’T BREATHE
AND I CAN’T WAIT
WE HAVE TO REFRIGERATE”
And everyone’s getting kinda freaked out and not quite knowing if the plane is gonna even go to Newark
And the captain gets on the intercom to see if there’s a doctor on the flight and the young couple from Jersey in the row in front of me actually ARE
One is GI and one is ER and over the five hours of the flight they go back like eight times and they calm the guy down
And as we are coming into land the flight attendant leans over to the Doctor Couple from Jersey and says
“thank you so much for helping and being kind”
and they smile and say real humbly
“no problem I mean this is just what we do”
and I sorta start sniffling
And then the flight attendant leans in close to the Doctor Couple from Jersey and, real real quiet, says don’t worry you’ll each get a $150 flight voucher for helping out
And this
This is what
America
now
feels like
all
the
time
to me.
Oh man America you made me you formed me you horrify me you inspire me and I feel strangled and bound and still
I love you in ways I can only describe with a poem
like this.